


i see the pain hidden in your pride

by leov66



Series: your heart's a mess [5]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mentions of Anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-16
Updated: 2017-06-16
Packaged: 2018-11-14 20:15:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11215491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leov66/pseuds/leov66
Summary: "it's just- too much, you know? i can't do this."sometimes, even yuri plisetsky breaks. and god, does it hurt for otabek to watch.





	i see the pain hidden in your pride

text message 9:03 pm

  
literally just a kitten: beka  
literally just a kitten: are u there  
literally just a kitten: can i uh  
literally just a kitten: come over

  
9:08 pm

  
mr adult: Are you alright?  
literally just a kitten: yeah (?)  
literally just a kitten: i dont know

 

Roughly thirty minutes later, Yuri was already at his door, his cat's bright pink carrier in one hand and his old bag (the one he had when he arrived at JFK almost two years before, the only one he had at the time) in the other. Otabek didn't even ask any questions when the blond simply lay his things on the floor and reached out for a hug. He played with his hair and held him for as long as he needed to be held until he felt Yuri relax ever the slightest bit.

 

"Let's sit down, you look tired, kitten," he said softly and brushed a stray lock of his hair away. "You want a blanket?"

 

By the time Potya was freed from the carrier and given water, Yuri had already sat down on his small couch and covered himself with the beige blanket he once bought in Almaty and insisted that Otabek keep. He looked like a sad burrito and in any other situation, the Russian boy might have already made a joke about it.

He sat close to him and together they sat in silence until Yuri felt comfortable enough to talk about whatever had happened.

 

"I just-," his voice cracked and it honestly broke his heart to see how much he was struggling. "It's just- too much, you know? I can't do this."

"Can't do what, dear?" Despite his good intentions, it still remained a mystery for him where Yuri's issues came from. It seemed as though he had achieved everything he'd ever dreamt of yet it wasn't uncommon that his usually cold demeanor broke like that.

"Anything. I'm so fucking tired, Beka, and it's just the beginning, I'm gonna be doing this for the next...I don't know, seven? eight years? I need a break but if I take a break I'll ruin the whole thing and I just can't stop fucking thinking."

"But you love dancing, it's your life, isn't it? A few years ago, you would've killed a man if that made youwhat you're doing now," Otabek said. He wasn't exacly the best at it.

"How am I supposed to improve something if I don't even see that I'm doing it wrong? Those people, they're the best ones there are. From all over the world. They're all friends and I'm just a fucking loner that can't even do what the rest can."

"Don't belittle yourself, Yura, I've seen you perform. You belong with the best."

Yuri wrapped the blanket closer around himself and looked down.  
"Everything's too much right now, I can't do it. Just...hold me 'till it's fine again, okay?"

 

And so he did. It was hard for him not to be able to actually help Yuri and instead just watch him at such a state, but it wasn't the first time, either. He held him, joked about some stupid things, braided his hair (or at least attempted to) and later put on a dumb movie they both knew by heart. They both knew it was going to be okay, but at the moment it hurt nevertheless.

 

"I'm happy I've got you, you know?" Yuri said a few hours later, tired from all the emotions, his voice still quiet, shaky and far different from the usual proud one. What mattered was that he was beginning to feel warm and okay again and it was all that mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> work title from bruno mars' 'mirror'
> 
> if youre suffering from an anxiety disorder, try to seek out help, but do it for yourself, not anybody else. i love you, stay strong and remember the world can be a good place sometimes:-)


End file.
